10/29/14 - All About THAT Marvel Thing, This Morning...

Well hold me the !@#$ down, bend me over, bang me like I asked !@#$ing nicely and don't stop til 2019. 

So, I take it you !@#$ing heard the same news I did, today?

In a word or two, !@#$ing very amazingly happy to see this lineup. This shows that Marvel has not been !@#$ing slacking. It also shows that, after DC threw down the !@#$ing gauntlet, the other week, Marvel was happy to throw down their own, and make it the !@#$ing Infinity Gauntlet at that.

So what am I happy about? Well, the news that we're getting a Black Panther movie has sent me over the !@#$ Moon. I'm also !@#$ing thrilled that we are going to get a Captain Marvel movie, and that it's going to be Carol !@#$ing Danvers, rather than poor old Mahr-Vell.

And getting the Inhumans in there, given the speculation that they'll be using the I-word to explain powers in the MCU since they can't !@#$ing use the M-word? Brilliant. Especially since I have a major fan-crush on Black Bolt.

From "Illuminati." The next panel had me laughing for hours.

 (I'm also happy to see we'll be getting GotG2 a couple months early. Because !@#$ yeah.)

And I am also really, super-!@#$ing happy to see that, starting in 2017, we will be getting three MCU movies a year. Hold up your hands and sing halle-!@#$ing-luiah, boys and girls. 

What am I not happy about? Well, !@#$ it, I want there to be a Black Widow movie. I am !@#$ing sick and tired of excuses. Scarlet J has shown us that she can !@#$ing carry a movie, and it's time we got to see Natasha on her own, kicking !@#$.

I'm also a little !@#$ed about the casting on Black Panther. I was hoping for someone like Chiwetel Ejiofor or Djimon Hounsou. Then again, I'm willing to give their casting a chance. So far they've made good !@#$ing choices.

So, based on what we know, let's play SPYGOD PREDICTS!

"Future movies such as these will affect you in the theater."

And here's the story I'm seeing happen, here:

Avengers 2: Age of Ultron: Bad !@#$ goes down. The team gets split over what happens.

Ant Man: light hearted caper !@#$ that will probably lead to our hero joining one side or the other.

Captain America: Civil War: Cap tries to find Bucky, but the conflict that happened in Age of Ultron leads to Tony and Cap butting heads over who to serve in the meantime.

Doctor Strange: Trans-cosmic magic stuff that may or may not have a !@#$ thing to do with what we've seen so far, but will probably feature at least one Infinity Gem.

Guardians of the Galaxy 2: More space craziness, with a possibility of them running straight into Thanos, and having to get the Collector along for the ride to get to those stones before purple-face does.

Thor: Ragnarok: Well, we know the !@#$ing Infinity Gauntlet's in the treasure chamber along with all that other crazy !@#$. And Loki's on the throne pretending to be Odin. And Asgard isn't doing too well after Thor II. So how much do you want to bet Thanos shows up, stomps the place flat, and takes a stone and the gauntlet?

Black Panther: Well, Cap's shield is busted, and he needs vibranium to fix it. Will T'Challa be happy about that? Will he join a side in the Civil War? Or will he be the one who helps !@#$ing end it?

Avengers III.1 - Infinity War: The !@#$ hits the fan. Thanos comes to Earth to take a final Infinity Stone from wherever the !@#$ it is (Doctor Strange? Loki's Staff? Something else?) and it's all we can do to keep him from leveling the place. Clearly we need help, which may come from the Guardians of the Galaxy at some point.

Captain Marvel: We get some more help, courtesy of Carol Danvers, who either gets some Kree powers by way of the same !@#$ that's going around Marvel's Agents of Shield, or some other way. We get some cosmic !@#$, either way.

The Inhumans: More help, I'm sure. Are they the result of Kree experimentation on humans? Or something different? I'm suspecting they'll have come out and taken a bow before then, but hopefully we'll get the full !@#$ing monty, here, as they join forces with our heroes to help deal with Thanos.

Avengers III.2 - Infinity War: All hands combine, Thanos gets taken down, people die and !@#$ goes boom, and then... ????

Past that, I need more !@#$ing beer, and a look at Phase 4.

But this has been an amazing !@#$ing day, folks. Keep watching. I think MCU is poised to knock DC off its pedestal, again.

What all do you think, Agents? Are you salivating or reserving judgment? Any movies you could do without, or want to see in there? Are you down with the casting choices and sequence of films?

And do you not agree with me that we need to start making "Katee Sackhoff is Captain Marvel or we RIOT" shirts?

I mean, Jesus !@#$ing Christ. Separated at Birth or what?